The next summer, they were on the beach again. M and J. Holding each other. Ah, what it means to believe in love!...
M: You inspire me.
J: I've been told...
M: Modesty. Not your style, huh?
J: You are so foolish... We're all so, so foolish...
M: Forever and a day, you and I...
J: Just you
M: YES!
J: King and queen of the world
M: You make loving fun, fun, fun!
J: I wouldn't mind getting in between the sheets with you...
And they kept spinning and spinning...
Last year:
M: So, what do we do?
J: What do we always do?
M: Fight? he remembered
J: That too, but...
M: I want...
J: To spend a holiday in your arms.
M: To make chocolate cake with you. Do you think we have time?
J: Mmm, chocolate...
M: I've been thinking...
J: Do you realize we've been together four months?
M: That's...
J: So much...
M: Where did they go? he cried.
He was sad.
J: Don't. Please, don't.
M: I don't want to go. I don't want to have to leave, ever. Leave you, leave all of this...
J: You're not leaving me. You're not.
But he wasn't there. His tears were racing down on his cheeks.
J: Please, stop! What's wrong? Please, stop!
M: I can't stop. I can't stop loving you, he tried to smile his way out of it.
J: You don't have to stop. Listen to me, you don't have to... it won't be long before we see each...
He passed out.
Hours later...
M: I'm such a fool.
J: We're all fools...
M: I can't bare it. I can't handle leaving you. I can't...
She took his hands and wrapped them around her waist. She held his head and pressed it on her chest.
J: Listen to this, she said, if you won't listen to me!
His tears disappeared, suddenly. He was there. But, then again, he wasn't there. He was...
Hours later...
J: M, my feet are numb. We've been staying like this for a while... can you let me move, just a bit?
But he didn't reply. She freaked out...
J: M, can you hear me?
She pushed him away and grabbed his face with her palms. No, he wasn't dead... thank God! He was just sleeping.
J: But... but... we're in the...
... park, she was about to say. But what's the use? He was smiling, in his sleep. He fell asleep with a smile...
She didn't want to sleep. She didn't want to close her eyes. She looked up, at the sky, her eyes all a reflection of the thousands of stars out there. He was there, with her...
How could he faint? How could he cry like that? How could the sky be so dark?
Suddenly, without realizing what she was doing, she stood up and stared at him. Time passed. He was there. He was there, with her... and he wasn't going to be there soon. He was going away. Will he come back? Will he still love me?
But their love was... so...
She walked. Slowly, away from him. She was crying now, too, and she started to run. And she ran till her legs couldn't stand it anymore. Her eyes full of tears, her breath horribly rushed, her heart wanting to explode.
J: But he was there, with me... HE WAS THERE!!! she yelled
Then she made a decision. One that would change her whole life...
It was almost morning. She ran for hours. But, finally, she was there: a jewelry shop.
J: Hi.
X: Hello, can I help you?
J: Yes, I'm here to get an engagement ring. Well, two... For me and my... future...
But she stopped. X could see, she had tears in her eyes.
X: Let me help you. What are you looking for?
J: Just show me what you have.
She knew. That second she knew that just by seeing them, she would know which pair to pick.
But X couldn't help wondering why her face was sad, and why she cried so heavily. She looked tired, worn out, but glowing.
J: Please tell me you know what you're doing!
X: What's that?
J: Oh, she blushed, I was just... talking to myself.
X: Here's what we have. I'd recommend...
But X stopped. Her eyes were glowing, she saw what she was looking for.
J: Blue. How much are these?
When she heard the price, she collapsed on the floor.
J: How on Earth could I afford that?
She was hearing voices. She was in doubt. She was... thinking of him.
J: I need them tonight. Now. Is there any conceivable way that I can pay for them later?
Probably all her life.
X looked at her. Couldn't possibly do this to the girl, couldn't say no.
X: Okay, here's how it is. You give me what you have now, and leave me your ID. Then you can pay the rest some other day, but soon.
J: Okay, she thought.
Maybe he wouldn't take it and she'll just bring it back... but no, she mustn't think like that. Today, now, she will get to him. And they will say those words...
X: There you go.
J: Here's my ID.
X: You have a great day, okay? And try smiling sometime.
J: Thank you, and there was a faint trace of one.
He woke up.
M: Where is she? to himself
She had never left him before. And he was cold, he was tired, he was... leaving in two days.
M: Excuse me, sir, what time is it? he asked a stranger
But then, he saw her, and forgot to hear the answer to his question. She was running. So was he.
J: You. We need to talk.
He could see - she cried all night.
J: We have to...
She took a deep breath.
One day, one time, there was a he and a she. They were in love. And he was leaving, but not for good. That day, he promised her that he'll be with her again, soon, so, so soon. And what's a couple of years when you compare them with a lifetime of togetherness?
Nothing.
That moment, something got into her. She wanted to do this, and she wanted to do it right, and funny, and lovely like he made her feel. He told her she was beautiful, everyday, and sometimes she felt it was too often, but never dared to tell him.
She called him baby, everyday, and sometimes he felt it was too often, but never dared to tell her.
She took off her jacket and laid it in front of her. She knelt down, and pulled out a small little box from her back pocket.
J: I think I have to ask you something.
He was stunned. He was... smiling. For the first time in a long time.
M: I think I want to hear you out, he almost whispered.
J: It took just four months for me to know. Sometimes, when I think of you, I see a house, a dream, a life, the magic place I want to spend my life in. I walk into that house, and it's you. It's all you. You're the one who built it, you're the one who made it come to life. It's your heart - my house. And I feel at home in there. And I'm here, today, kneeling on a jacket in front of you, to ask you this...
his mouth was open...
J: Will you, M, marry me?
That night:
J: Sometimes, the answer is in the sky... but there's no stars up there without you next to me. You're taking all the stars.
That day, very late, he took her home. Then, he went to the jewelry store - the one they both knew, the one she must have visited.
M: That should cover it. And, please, when she comes here, just give her this...
A cube.
On the front face, there were two giraffes, holding hands, staring at each other, and a big "YES!" right between them.
M: ... oh, and, please, show it to her this face first!
And he walked away, thinking he'll see her again, soon, and thinking of her goodbye words: You inspire me...
When she woke up there was a chocolate cake on her bed. Her name was spelled with whipped cream, and under it there was a phrase: "Forever and a day, you and I"
Find all LSS here
Monday, April 30, 2007
[Long story short] Four
Saturday, April 07, 2007
Sometimes
Sometimes, every touch is too much. Sometimes, anything you do just gets things more and more complicated. When losing yourself in trying to do what's best, when forgetting how important it is to live your life, when asking for too much from too many people, that's sometimes.
Sometimes is everything and sometimes is all the time...
Sometimes I was in Romania and at this time of the day I was getting ready. For what? To go "sa luam lumina" ([RO] "to be enlightened"), with family. Sometimes, I took the SATs and called the dearest person in the world right after, to reveal the news. "How was it? How was it?"...
Sometimes I cry when I should laugh. Or smile.
Sometimes I'm sad when I should be happy.
Sometimes I'm selfish when I should give.
Sometimes I defend myself from an imaginary attack. Sometimes I imagine I have too many problems, when, in fact, I have none...
Sometimes is everything and sometimes is all the time...
Sometimes I lose it, sometimes I get a grip and hold on 'till it hurts too bad. Sometimes I feel the world has come to an end. Yet sometimes I wake up and life is pink. Pink...ish. Sometimes I write a post at 9:07PM on Saturday, April 07.
Sometimes I fear I'm just not able to defeat my own fears. And sometimes I fear I am.
I live a life, don't I? I live a life for you. And, believe it or not, I want the same things for us. Believe it or not, I wish we'd stop being sad and just be happy; so, so, so happy with what we have. I know you, I really do, and I know that these are just hard times. and we are growing up...
Sometimes I feel we've got too long to go. And then I see you, and for an hour or two I forget what time is. That's when it's never too long.
Sometimes, I forget that living life means living your own. And, of course, most of the times I'm dumb. Or dumbfounded. Hear me now, for, on Easter eve, I find little peace. On Easter eve I miss all there is to miss.
Yet I am not sad. Nor am I discouraged. Why, oh Lord, is that?
Could it be because of you? Have you become so much? I think, I feel you did. My life has changed. My life has stopped and started since that day. And now it's on. And I know who I am, thanks to us. Thanks to you, and thanks to me. And thank God.
On this day, I say to you: Happy Easter. On this day, I find peace, the inner peace that we know. And by this time tomorrow, I'm dreaming of a time of serenity, cause you are "o oaza de lumina" ([RO] an oasis of light) for me. And I, for you. And we shall meet and remember. And feel. And live. There's life to be lived. There's things to be done. There's all I am and all you are...
Sometimes I write poems. Sometimes I write. Sometimes I fall in love. But love doesn't hurt. I might hurt. And for what?
Sometimes you hit your head. "Is it still round?" I ask. You laugh.
Sometimes I see my friends. And, for a moment, I remember it all over again: Why? Why is it worth it? Because... sometimes.
Sometimes it's just too hard. Sometimes the only way out seems like giving up. And, for a moment, I remember it all over again: Why? Why is it worth it? Because... sometimes.
"Here's a riddle for you! Find the answer! There's a reason for the world..."
Sometimes, I see what I do. What I want to do. Sometimes I feel I'll blow up. But then I remember it all over again. Why? Because... sometimes.
Love. Passion. Faith. Hope. Ambition. Will. Strength. Desire. Interest. Belief. All in one... me? Sometimes I lose it. Sometimes I don't. Aren't we all sometimes?
Sometimes is every time. Sometimes is everything. Sometimes is you and me. So, heh, let's be!"Sometimes I run
Sometimes I hide
Sometimes I'm scared of you
But all I really want is to hold you tight
Treat you right
Be with you day and night
Baby all I need is time"
(Britney Spears - Sometimes)
Sometimes I need someone to hold. You.
Sometimes you want to run away. Sometimes I do, too.
Sometimes I fight: This sometimes is all the time.
Sometimes I do not love: This sometimes is never.
All I really want... I've already got, haven't I?"Sometimes I don't know if I'll make it
Sometimes I learn, sometimes I forget. Sometimes I listen, sometimes I don't understand. Sometimes I'm here, sometimes I'm there. I can see or I'm just blind. I believe or I give up. Sometimes is happy-sad. Bittersweet. Pink...ish... But "I'm gonna do it anyway"!
Sometimes I wished I could walk away
Sometimes I don't know if I'll make it through
But you know I'm gonna do it anyway"
(Roger Alan Wade - Sometimes I don't know if I'll make it)
His story:"It was one of those days when it's a minute away from snowing and there's this electricity in the air, you can almost hear it. And this bag was, like, dancing with me. Like a little kid begging me to play with it. For fifteen minutes. And that's the day I knew there was this entire life behind things, and... this incredibly benevolent force, that wanted me to know there was no reason to be afraid, ever. Video's a poor excuse, I know. But it helps me remember... and I need to remember... Sometimes there's so much beauty in the world I feel like I can't take it, like my heart's going to cave in." (Ricky Fitts, American Beauty)
Mine:
There's no reason to be afraid. Sometimes I am.
There's so much beauty in the world. And so much love... so much feeling in the world...
Sometimes I feel like giving up, but I'm not going to. Because, in the end, sometimes is every time. And I don't want to give up. Don't judge, simply reason: nothing is every time. Nothing is everything. Everything is sometimes (or something, if you will), all the time. And that's just it: believe me or not, don't judge.
Sometimes we are. Sometimes we're... not.
And sometimes all you can do is pray. Hope. Love. Faith.So I lay my head back down
Sometimes we think we can do it alone. But sometimes we can't. Come here, talk to me. I'm here... I'm listening.
And I lift my hands
and pray to be only Yours
I pray to be only Yours
I know now you're my only hope
(Mandy Moore - Only hope)
Sometimes, it's better to just let it out... let me hear it, let me hear from you, all of you.
This is my end song..."Tough, you think you've got the stuff
And here I was, thinking that sometimes I won't write about you...
You're telling me and anyone
You're hard enough
You don't have to put up a fight
You don't have to always be right
Let me take some of the punches
For you tonight
Listen to me now
I need to let you know
You don't have to do it alone
And it's you when I look in the mirror
And it's you when I don't pick up the phone
Sometimes you can't make it on your own
We fight all the time
You and I...that's alright
We're the same soul
I don't need...I don't need to hear you say
That if we weren't so alike
You'd like me a whole lot more
Listen to me now
I need to let you know
You don't have to do it alone
And it's you when I look in the mirror
And it's you when I don't pick up the phone
Sometimes you can't make it on your own
I know that we don't talk
I'm sick of it all
Can - you - hear - me - when - I -
Sing, you're the reason I sing
You're the reason why the opera is in me...
Where are we now?
I've still got to let you know
A house still doesn't make a home
Don't leave me here alone...
And it's you when I look in the mirror
And it's you that makes it hard to let go
Sometimes you can't make it on your own
Sometimes you can't make it
The best you can do is to fake it
Sometimes you can't make it on your own"
(U2 - Sometimes you can't make it on your own)
Monday, April 02, 2007
CrazYly
Starting today, I wanna try a crazy wacky thing each day. And for those who really care, don't worry, it won't imply risking my life in any way, or doing "something bad", I swear, I'll be good and careful! :)
If you've got ideas or suggestions, or just wanna tell stuff that you tried on your own, you're welcome to join me!
In the spirit of adventure, no?...
Warm wishez!
Oh, and, I'll post a story soon... It's waiting to come out of me.
Saturday, March 03, 2007
[Long story short] Three
M: Sometimes I feel that no matter what I do I'll never even have the chance to begin my "project" in this world. There's always something missing. For some reason, when I can think it, me, when I realize what I want to do here, with my little piece of this puzzle called The Universe, I'm overwhelmed. And I feel that I have known, thought, understood and felt so much of this place, and yet so little...
J: I love you, you know...
M: The world is a fascinating place...
J: You think the world is one whole?
M: One lonely whole?...
J: Yeah, like one... lonely... whole...
M: I love you too, baby.
J: Baby...
M: What do you see when you look around you? Are things there, is anything happening?
J: It might be a dream. But I would be sad only shortly, if it was, cause, after all, it's a dream with you...
M: That scares me. What you just said. That makes it possible for us to be just brains in a jar. If man were given what he needs I don't think he could believe that the world is not real, I really think he would have to struggle against his own self to believe that it's an illusion.
J: Sometimes I get the feeling that you're living at a totally different level from me. And then I remember how much of you I have (pointing at her heart) in here. And then I know we're on the same level. The fact that I can feel everything about you, that I can even know and understand it, always makes me speechless. I dunno what to say...
M: Sometimes when I look at someone I desire full perception, I want to intrude inside of that person and see the world through his or her eyes. And I want that so much that I can almost feel it's real. I'm not sure if it's even close to the actual thing, but, to some extent, that doesn't even matter.
J: Yeah, because, in fact, you can never know for real, with your mind, what the inside of the other is like. That's why you should always listen carefully and not judge - cause you don't know. And I guess the only way we work in this world is by giving meaning to things, even if they don't have one. Even if it's the wrong meaning.
She took off her top.
J: See? This is a bra, right. But, in itself, it wouldn't exist if it weren't for us, human beings. The only reason this object means a bra to me is because I think of what a bra is, and my concept of it is mine alone. Someone who hasn't seen one doesn't know what it is.
M: I've seen one.
He smiled.
J: (smiling) Yes, you have, and you can have this one, she said, walking towards him and throwing it.
M: I love it when we talk philosophy before...
J: Before what?
(silence)
M: When I think of what matters to me I've got a dilemma: is it you, is it love, or is it simply everything in the world, but with you on top?
J: (climbing on top of him) Ya playin' with me, boy?
M: No... He was laughing. No. I mean that, are we the reason for the world?
J: That's a riddle we can never solve, isn't it? All I know is...
M: All we know is, dear.
J: All we know is that we can't help loving each other.
M: Right. Maybe love is such a thing that you can't even realize when you're feeling it. Cause I feel that I've got no problem in the world. Yet, I cannot comprehend what I feel about you. I think of you, I picture you, and you're so familiar that I can't feel anything except that you're a part of me.
J: That's strange. When I think of you, when I imagine you, I feel you inside too. Hey, you're right... is this real?
M: Yeah, see, cause it's inside. Everything is inside, we're reducing the world. Or, maybe it's transcendence?
J: Well, real or imaginary, it's a story, our story, and as long as I am you and I, and you are you and I, I can honestly say that I'm happy. Not that I'm not going to make something of myself, or live for myself as well, but, in a way, I can't just for myself. I'm addicted to you... Her breath was so close now that he could feel her warm exhale.
M: You know what Nietzsche said about relying on God? I feel that every one of us should try, as much as possible, to make it on his own, or, at least, not expect help from God. Help from others, yes. And if there's a heaven up there, you and I will meet again. But, regardless of that, there's a heaven down here, there's a life here that we have to live.
J: And I know best how wrong running away from this life is. Now shut up and kiss me!
She was anxious. This was their first time on the beach. She pressed her lips onto his.
---
They were touching, side by side. Lying on the sand. Staring at the sky. The sunset...
M: You and I?
J: No. We... all...
M: We're here to live, and even that might not be true. I'm here to make a big difference, I have my ambitions...
J: Maybe I could change the way people are seen and understood, you know? I'm not that smart, but...
M: Stop it. Any human being on this planet could do quite a lot for the world. Even a bunch of little things! Little things make a big difference. And no, actually you are smart.
J: Why do you believe in me so much?
M: I don't... I believe in me, and (smiling) it just "happened" that you're (pointing at his heart) around, too.
J: Right. Wise ass.
---
J: There's so many unanswered questions...
M: Yeah...
J: You know that cliche about listening to your heart? It's true. That's where the answers lie.
M: The dreams. The beliefs. The hopes. The ideas. Everything has to do with our heart in the end. And...
J: ...and even if it might be just a part of our mind, or something, living is so connected to feeling that, that... you just can't live without...
M: You can, but...
J: Love.
M: That's the key. Love and you won't be afraid. Love is everything. "If there's no love, there's nothing!" ([RO] M. Preda, "Cel mai iubit dintre pamanteni")
They cuddled. It was much past time to sleep, but their eyes were widely open.
J: The sky is beautiful tonight.
---
M: Sleep well, angel...
J: You're my angel!
M was slightly blushing.
Find all LSS here
Friday, February 23, 2007
Deconfusing the confusion inside
Time. Time. So little time. Yet time is so slow...
I miss...
I want time to go faster now and then stop. But wait, it is so. It stops when I see you... it stops and then something fills me up. With love, hope, faith. I...
I miss me. I miss you. I miss the past, present, and future within us. I miss everything. And I'm so tired that it barely hurts. And I'm smiling, you know, the beautiful smile; I feel so alive!
---
You fight with yourself for something for so long, and think that you'll keep it up, keep believing, keep fighting, and when you succeed you don't know what to say. How to react. Nothing. Nothing!
I am naked in front of you, and I don't even know if I want to cover myself or to let you see...
---
I'm not sure I'm ready for this. How would I know when I'm ready? Every night I go to sleep without knowing what I'll be feeling the morning after. I wake up and wonder what happened that night, where was I, where were you, where we were...
---
Breaking away from a world is hard. But coming back might be even harder, no matter how much faster it could be...
---
Fragments. Pieces. Of the same puzzle? Hope so.
That's what I've got. And I can't put them together. What's missing?
---
Thank God life gives me this chance: to wait for everything to come to me and make me feel and think again, to wait for the Universe to find me again; not that I've lost myself, but I must be somewhere very dim. Somewhere... in the dark. It seems that I just can't find the will to look inside of me, anymore. And tomorrow I'll wake up feeling differently...
---
There are days when I can't focus on anything. There are periods of time that fly by, and then I look back and think something like: "wow, where did the last hour go?" Sometimes I'm in class. Or at home. In the car. In bed. Taking a shower. Eating. Dreaming. Walking. Feeling. Thinking. Being...
Everywhere I am I can't be without you. Yet this strikes me so bad, so big that I'm almost blind. I can still remember, I can try to feel everything I felt once again, but it will never be the same.
Should it? I don't know. But I feel it shouldn't. I think we're supposed to make a new path for ourselves now. To find... a new way. More our way than it ever was before. Our hopes, our dreams, our ambitions. Our plans (yep, we don't have many actual 'plans', but...). Our lives... our whole lives are just beginning. And all that is so new and so exciting, and so big... that I'm not sure I can even begin to comprehend it.
It's overwhelming!
---
Sometimes I just want to be alone. Alone with myself so I can be with you.
---
Sometimes I just want to be alone. Alone. Alone with myself.
---
Sometimes I just want to be alone. Alone. Without myself...
---
Sometimes...
---
Pupi.
---
I would love to read you, think you, feel you. Write me, anything. (And yes, I'm writing to you. Don't wonder who! If you're reading this, I'm writing to you!)
Maybe you don't realize this but I'm helpless. I'm so helpless that I'll keep writing you even if you hate me. Even if you ignore me. I'll always be here. Here for you...
---
I realize my life means a couple of things first and many many many many many others after that. A while ago, I think I was in 11 grade (so that makes it 3 years ago almost), I wrote about what means most to me in this life. There were three things: being needed/loved(1), knowledge(2), creativity/nature(3). Here's a short explanation about each of them:
1. "In viata de pe pamant, excluzand viitorul meu ca fiinta spirituala, suflet, in Rai sau Iad, prima mea prioritate este sa ma simt necesar." (In my earthly life, excluding my future as a spiritual being, or my soul, in Heaven or Hell, my first priority is to feel I'm necessary.)
2. "E pe locul doi, fiindca fara cunoastere nu pot indeplini prima parte."(Second place because without knowledge I cannot fulfill the first part.)
"Cunoasterea aici cuprinde cateva domenii mari si late: psihologia umana, pe primul loc, la mare distanta de urmatoarele (era inainte, iar acum s-au apropiat celelalte), informatica, matematica, engleza, practica materiala (prin asta se intelege cat de bine ma descurc de unul singur cu materialismul [adica generic vorbind banii, sau gatitul, s.a.]). "(Here, knowledge embraces a couple of big areas: human psychology, first, followed by computer science, math, english, and practical stuff (anything materialistic [e.g. cash, cooking, etc.]).)
3. "Creativitatea consta la mine in randamentul folosirii resurselor." (Creativity, from my perspective, includes the ratio/efficiency with which I use my capabilities.) To put it simple, the outside brought inside through the first two, the way I see the world resonate with my own self.
*** Excerpted from an old chapter
It's interesting, for me, to notice that even since back then I knew a lot about who I am. It's amazing that, to some extent, I am that same guy. And what's also a big thing is how the first is the only independent part of myself that always surfaces, through anything. I believe in love... I believe in love as a reason to be here, in a way. And anytime I don't quite get why I am this way, something happens, and It shows me again. It who? Dunno. The Universe, God? One and the same, maybe...
Whenever the course of events lets me down, the second and third parts of me came to the aid of the first one. And each one depends on the ones above it... which is why the first one is ... everything :)
Even though I'm essentially the same, some things changed...
The "new" me:
1. Love. Hope. Faith. (it changed the orientation compared to "the old number 1")
2. Knowledge. Spirit. Will. (Metaphysical) desire.
3. The world as an opportunity. The Universe as the "other". The purpose of everything else.
1. Although my reason for being is not only this, love, hope and faith are essentially the three things that make me... me. I believe I'm made to live life as everything, get involved as much as I can, put my heart in it and not take it back. Live it till the end. That's love. Hope... hope that I will make it through. "Hope is what makes us wake up in the morning", says a famous quote, hope is what one needs to believe in love during those hardest moments. Faith is what you need when everything else fails. Do you know that song: "Have a little faith in me"? Sometimes, love hurts, hope is almost nothing, and we run away. And then faith kicks in, as the last drop in the ocean... the last piece of you above sea level, perhaps. This trio is not mine, originally, but it's now a part of me. I know it's also in the bible, but, as it happens with me all the time, the people I care most about bring me my beliefs. This also works the other way: my beliefs bring around people I can bond with most. I think this happens to many of us, honestly...
2. All those are intertwined into a strong... web. Knowledge encompasses my unceasing curiosity, cause I almost never get sick of learning new things, understanding life, and feeling my own reality, or imagining other people and their world.
Spirit is the tiny thread that climbs on the ladder of life, on its way swirling around other spirits, yours perhaps, maybe, actually hopefully finding a dear company, and pushing forward through the web of the Universe...
Will is... not so much free will, but will as the strength and ambition to move on through life, the part that is possible because of the LHF.
The (metaphysical) desire is strongly connected to all the first three.
Metaphysical = Literally, beyond the physical realm, beyond that which we can realize or discover with our five senses. Also, a branch of philosophy which studies the “beingness” or inherent nature of reality. (Google definition)
Don't think of desire in the literal term of wanting something to posess. Rather, desire in the metaphysical sense means wanting to give yourself to that something or someone, making you a part of it, instead of grabbing and pulling it towards you. This may sound generic or too broad, so you can imagine a metaphysical desire as the reward of you meaning more than just yourself, the spiritual significance of, say, the cup you drank milk in every day when you were a kid. If you can give yourself to something/someone without expecting anything in return, you remain there, and you gain so much more. Because, see, whenever you expect return, you are actually less, regardless if you receieve it or not! I'll write about this soon, only I haven't researched enough. But if you want to look into it, read about intentionality and psychism, works by Francisco Romero and Emmanuel Levinas.
3. This is kind of equivalent to the creativity I chose before. The idea is that the Universe is here and it gives me the opportunity to be a part of it. Thus, I intend to look at it as if it were at least as great as I am, and give it at least big a chance as it gives me. So to speak, the "other" is not to be reduced to "myself", by similarity or anything else. That is disconsidering the whole nature of the Universe. I'm not sure I can even comprehend what the Universe means, much less make sense of its little parts. At least I should not disrespect it. And the impossibility of KNOWING something entirely is a source of infinite creativity. I hope you understand this.
I'm still not sure of how to explain and fit in my belief that, even though you can't KNOW something entirely, you can FEEL it. Or him/her... It's a naive belief, perhaps, but I feel that, even though our senses are limited, there is a... way... special way, through which you can really be something else... someone else... oh and that sounds so beautiful to me... I'm such a romantic kid!
So, this is where my reasoning ends today, and here's another part of me heading out to you...
